Email Template: Found Your Email Top Secret

Bonjour {{contact_first||there}},

You've never heard of me. Hi, I'm {{user_first}}. I got your email from top secret servers using a biorythmic metaspyder with a 100GB nutro-plasmic VPN that I….

Ok, I got it from the Internet.

Let me get right down to it…

I don't know if this is a problem you have, but I help [insert what problem my product solves].

[insert another simple line about what I do]

I'm not sure if this is a problem you have, and if it's not, that's totally cool.

If it is, would you be open to a quick 7-minute chat?

I promise to be somewhat useful, and I might even tell you my favorite joke.

Finally, it's time to release my favorite weapon.

A drawing I made of us smiling together after a successful working relationship. Just what you've always wanted:

🙂   🙂

I await your stern but fair reply,

{{user_first}} {{user_last}}

[insert job title one / job title two / job title three - funniest]